In a couple of days, I’ll be speaking to a group of businesswomen at a local event. One point that I plan to make, within the bigger topic, is the benefit of treating ourselves as an authentic leader would rather than as an overbearing manager would.
I found it ironic that, as I’m writing about setting realistic goals and embracing your limitations with compassion instead of imposing rigidity and judgment on yourself, this is the morning I didn’t post my daily blog.
Am I suddenly irresponsible or undedicated, did I let everyone down, did I fail? I first felt a bit of that but it was fleeting. The reality is no; I made a decision based on priorities in real-time.
I was up till the wee hours of the morning and decided to sleep for the 3 remaining hours before my alarm went off so I could do my job well today. Decisions have consequences and I'm okay with that.
Was there a part of me that wished it would have naturally worked out differently? I am truly enjoying writing daily blogs, I appreciate the process of organizing and refining my thoughts, and I love the feedback. Learning that my friends and colleagues are finding the daily posts valuable is amazing! I did experience some disappointment when I realized that I wouldn’t have time to post this morning before I left for work. So, yes, I wish it had worked out differently at first.
But, and this is the best part, according to the Triple “A” Approach, I still had 3 options:
• Alter the situation or my approach to it • Avoid the situation • Accept the situation
It was too late to "alter" the situation, and "avoiding", in this particular situation, didn’t really apply. I could, however, "accept" the situation and "alter" my response to it – so, I did. By employing the “acceptance” approach, I could see actual benefits. Not only was I no longer disappointed, but I had also become grateful.
Here’s why:
•THE OPPORTUNITY: Not posting, feeling the disappointment, and then choosing to “accept” instead of stress out or judge myself, has provided me with a fresh reminder of the practical truth of what I will share at this upcoming event.
•THE TIMING: It’s perfect; I have a full tank of compassion and humility. Experiencing this so close to the event, I will easily be able to understand the struggles of other women and engage with empathy.
•THE GIFT: I wouldn’t have had the courage to purposely cause myself the discomfort of not posting this morning, but since it happened for me (not to me), I get to walk on the stage with renewed confidence knowing the value of what I have to offer. Hopefully, that translates into an even more valuable delivery for the businesswomen who will be there.
When you encounter stressful situations that are out of your control, do you have a plan of action different from the Triple “A” Approach that you use to help you reframe, gain a new perspective, and find gratitude? I’d love to hear about it. #leadership #selfleadership #encouragement #gratitude #humility #compassion #notperfect #goodintentions #mindset #coach
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